Alice in Wonderland (2010)

Chalk this up to reviews that didn't age well.  I can't believe I've been writing this blog long enough to be able to say that.  Obviously, I was not aware of how much of an abusive alcoholic Johnny Depp would become in a decade.  Even then, I was aware he had problems and his acting quality had certainly nosedived since his heyday, but I reasoned it was likely just him getting lazy with fame, not crawling into a bottle.  That being said, he really doesn't affect this movie so much.  You can kind of ignore him.  Crispin Glover, however, only grows more fantastic with a rewatch.  I don't know that this is anyone's favorite adaptation but the costumes and makeup are still perfect.  Originally posted 07 Mar 10.  There are many things I am not a fan of. Tim Burton is not one of those things. I have enjoyed pretty much every single thing he has ever produced. So I went into Alice in Wonderland with the expectation that I would enjoy it unless the movie was a complete trainwreck.

It's not a trainwreck.

It is very Tim Burton-y, though. I didn't see it in 3D because I think that's kind of gimmicky and a movie should be able to stand on its own as a narrative instead of trying to reach out and strangle me.

All of the characters are appropriately creepy in their own ways, and the voice talent is prodigious. Christopher Lee is the voice of the Jabberwocky, for example, and he elevates the animation to malevolent heights. Anne Hathaway minces around in blinding white, mixing up vile potions while lilting breathlessly. Crispin Glover is |-| that close to getting a talk with Chris Hansen. Willard seems restrained in comparison.

But let's talk about the star of the show, shall we?

No, not her. Get real, people!

That's more like it!

It should come as absolutely no surprise to you when I say that Johnny Depp is completely psychotic as the Mad Hatter. My favorite moments of his screen time, however, aren't the lisping lunatic or wide-eyed mournful manic, but the growling murderous Scottish brogue declaiming the "Bloody Red Queen". That's sexy.

And, because the Powers That Be decided Alice shouldn't be a minor, there is an unprecedented opportunity for her to bone the Hatter. Who wouldn't jump at that?! Other obligations be damned! Everybody knows that the crazy ones are better in the sack. And he's really crazy! Plus he has a claymore!

Other than that small suspension of disbelief issue, the movie was a fun adventure down the rabbit hole suitable for all ages. My only complaint, besides the exclusion of some sweet sweet Hatter action, is that it could have been pushed further out of the envelope. I would have loved to see an R-rated Wonderland or at least PG-13.