Tomb Raider (2018)

First, I have to apologize and then we'll get to the movie.  I missed posting all last weekend because I was in Ireland.  It was kind of a last-minute thing but not so last minute that I couldn't have set something up to tell people if I had thought to do so, but I didn't.  I just left you guys in the lurch.  So I'm sorry about that.    Okay, so this is the new Tomb Raider.  And it is .... not going to break the video game movie curse.  I mean, it's a'ight.  It's just not great and not really an improvement over the last version.

Lara Croft (Alicia Vikander) is a bike messenger, scrounging up cash wherever she can because to come forward and claim her multi-million dollar inheritance would be to admit that her father (Dominic West) is dead and not just missing.  Her former caretaker, Ana (Kristin Scott Thomas), finally gets her to sign the paperwork and Lara discovers that her father has left her a puzzle box that leads to a secret room in the crypt of their enormous-ass house.  She starts poking around and uncovers pieces of the mystery her father was trying to solve, including his possible last location.

From this point, you should just watch Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.  Honestly, there's practically no difference.  I like Vikander as an actress but this script gives her almost nothing to do except get her ass beat 40 different ways.  If that's something you're into, give this movie a whirl.  It also gets points deducted for criminally underusing Daniel Wu and Walton Goggins.