Nominated for Best Visual Effects, Best Production Design, and Best Costume Design Yikes on bikes, guys. This is the worst Ridley Scott film I've ever seen. Content warning: war violence, animal death (horses), decapitation, suicide attempt, some gore
After the Revolution, a young(ish) military officer named Napoleon Bonaparte (Joaquin Phoenix) rises quickly through the ranks based on his extraordinary ability to commit large-scale violence. He meets Josephine (Vanessa Kirby) at a party and eventually marries her. His victories abroad continue even as France is buckling under its change in government and steps in as Emperor after a small coup d'etat. He is deposed and exiled but comes back like a bad rash until his final defeat at Waterloo by Arthur "The Beef" Wellesley, Duke of Wellington (Rupert Everett).
I vaguely remember seeing the marketing hyping this as a love story between Napoleon and Josephine, and I have to say it definitely isn't. Kirby and Phoenix have zero chemistry together or separately, with Kirby looking like an ice sculpture and Phoenix whining like a buzzsaw made of mosquitoes. The writing is spectacularly awful and the editing was done by a Magic Bullet. It is very pretty though.
Ridley Scott made this. Ridley Blade Runner Gladiator motherfucking ALIEN Scott made this. I am gobsmacked. And I've seen House of Gucci. I'm not even angry; I'm just disappointed.
It's streaming on Apple+. Don't do it. Love yourself.
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