Adaptation (2002)

 I really don't like Charlie Kaufman's work.  The more I see of it, the more I think he has serious, deep-seated issues with women and not in an "I'm examining my psyche through art" way.  More like a "when will the government issue me a woman so I can stop pretending to have a personality?" way.

Coming off the success of his script for Being John Malkovich, Charlie Kaufman (Nicolas Cage) is asked to adapt The Orchid Thief by Susan Orleans (Meryl Streep), a novel based on her interview with John Laroche (Chris Cooper), a horticulturalist who was arrested in the Florida Everglades trying to steal a rare orchid.  Kaufman soon becomes trapped in a hellish cycle of writer's block, self-loathing, and panic as he tries to create a story that captures the feel of the book.  He is also tortured by his twin brother Donald's (Nicolas Cage) success with more low-brow writing and ease with women.

This is billed as a comedy and I just don't see it.  I was utterly bored with the recursive self-pity and misogyny being presented, so much so that when things finally picked up in the last 30 minutes, I was too disgusted to care.  Adaptation is basically if Weird: The Al Yankovic Story had all of the whimsy and charm surgically removed and replaced with a mosquito whine and a sexual harassment lawsuit.  Fortunately, it's not streaming anywhere so you have to pay money to see it, which should be enough of a barrier to save the majority of people.