Shivers (1975)

  If they showed this move in high school Sex Ed, teen pregnancy and STIs would drop to zero.  

An unethical scientist (Fred Doederlein) uses his teenage lover (Cathy Graham) as a guinea pig to breed a parasite that turns people into sex maniacs.  He murders her but the damage is done and the parasite spreads through all the residents of an isolated luxury apartment building, despite the best efforts of the resident doctor (Paul Hampton).

Okay, so this movie is gross on so many levels.  

Level 1:  Intentionally.  Cronenberg has made an entire oeuvre of body horror and this is no exception.  Lumps swell under skin, slithering around inside the bodies before a hand-sized leech is expelled in bloody vomit.  It's nasty but acceptable.  

Level 2:  Disease horror.  This is not the movie to watch in the middle of an actual pandemic.  I just wanted to scream at all of these people for not washing their goddamn hands or wearing even the barest bit of PPE.  These are supposed to be doctors and a nurse for God's sake.  Again, though.  Horror movie.

Level 3:  Sexually.  Everybody gets raped.  Everybody.  It's A. Lot.  There's a ton of gratuitous nudity.  It's the 70s.  Okay.  But not a single woman in the film owns a bra?  Also, yikes.  

Level 4:  Violence against women in particular and some smattering of racism.  Did I mention all the raping?  Plus, the main character pointedly ignores the only Black female being assaulted in front of him to waste three bullets on a guy who had already committed murder.  

Level 5:  Implied pedophilia.  The gross dude who engineered the parasite is casually mentioned to have started a "relationship" with the girl he murders when she is twelve.  This goes unremarked upon for the rest of the film.  There is a scene in an elevator where a parasite-ridden waiter attacks a woman standing with her prepubescent daughter.  It cuts away but the implication is strong, bolstered by a later scene where the elevator opens and the waiter and child are sharing some gross, strawberry jam-filled pastry over the disheveled body of her mother.  Critical high level of nope there.

In terms of sheer audacity of violence and gore, it rivals The Last House on the Left, Hellraiser, and any place exploitation crosses with horror.  It's not a fun watch.  I found it kind of a slog, if I'm honest, but I can see its influence in other, later films which is worthwhile.  It's currently streaming on the Criterion Channel or for free on Tubi.

Big Eyes (2014)

  In a lot of ways, this is a perfect distillation of a Tim Burton film:  slightly creepy but whimsical, a washed out blonde lead, plastic suburbia, and a focus on the fake 50s nuclear family, but without the crutches of Johnny Depp, Danny DeVito, and Helena Bonham Carter.

Margaret Keane (Amy Adams) became a household name in the early 60s art scene for her painting of sad children with oversized eyes.  She painted hundreds and sold millions of dollars worth of original art as well as licensed reproductions in posters and postcards.  But no one knew because all the credit was taken by her husband Walter (Christoph Waltz), a brash, charming salesman.  It took a court case for the truth to out.

I've never liked the kitsch movement but Margaret Keane should be rightfully hailed as an icon, if only for the courage to insist on taking credit for her efforts in a time where good married ladies did not.  The movie is strong on portraying this and it does an admirable job.  Adams has always been good at vulnerability while Waltz has made quite a career out of cheerfully menacing characters.  He had to walk a particularly fine line to bring out the absurdity of Walter Keane while not detracting from his bullying.  

It's not a movie I'd throw into regular rotation.  It's a little too cynical to put next to Big Fish or Edward Scissorhands, but it's not bad.  Currently streaming for free on Tubi.

In the Mood for Love (2000)

  You guys, I'm so bad at Mondays.  And there was a holiday in the middle of the week, even.  I still could not get this post out.  Hopefully, it will just be an extra one today.

A pair of neighbors in 1960s Hong Kong, Mrs. Chan (Maggie Cheung) and Mr. Chow (Tony Leung), discover that their respective spouses are having an affair so they decide to have one as well.  What begins as a therapeutic revenge quickly grows into actual feelings and thus, a dilemma.

This film launched Wong Kar-Wai into international acclaim and it's easy to see why.  It's a visual feast, even if I felt some of the shots to be jarring.  I also dislike jazz and that seems to be the comparison everyone makes to this film, so your mileage may vary.  It's worth it for the costumes alone but also the desperately restrained longing between Cheung and Leung is just *chef's kiss*.  I hate romantic dramas with a passion (ha!) and I liked this film.  People who enjoy that sort of thing are going to be over the moon.  It's currently streaming on Criterion, HBO Max, and Kanopy.

Harriet the Spy (1996)

  This must have been one of those films you had to be in the moment for.  I can't imagine anyone choosing to watch it now.

Harriet (Michelle Trachtenberg) is an 11-year-old dreaming of becoming a writer.  Her nanny (Rosie O'Donnell) told her to write down all her observations in a notebook but when a bully exposes Harriet's unvarnished opinions, even her closest friends won't stand by her.

This was a major success for Nickelodeon's venture into motion pictures.  I fucking hated it though.  The main plot doesn't start until fifty minutes into the 100 minute runtime.  There are multiple subplots concerning the people Harriet spies on which are never explored, just given a pat answer at the end.  And Harriet is an unlikeable character.  She's a total brat who, when faced with the consequences of her own cruelty, doesn't apologize but doubles down on enacting vengeance on the people who are mad at her.  It's basically Mean Girls: Middle School without the wit, humor, or introspection.  But it is streaming on Tubi if you maybe have nostalgia or something.

Duck Soup (1933)

  This is not my favorite Marx Bros movie but it is still considered a classic comedy.  Its IMDb trivia page is wild, by the way.

Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx) is named head of Freedonia after a wealthy widow named Mrs. Teasdale (Margaret Dumont) refuses to loan the government any more of her money unless it is so.  Meanwhile, Ambassador Trentino (Louis Calhern) plots to woo Mrs. Teasdale for her money and hires spies Chicolini (Chico Marx) and Pinky (Harpo Marx) to dig up dirt on Firefly.  This is the only part of the plot that makes any sense.  Everything else is just an excuse for the Marx Brothers to be the Marx Brothers.

Part of the problem of being an innovator is that if you don't see the original first, it looks derivative because of all the imitations it spawned.  This movie was made in 1933 and a lot of the gags were completely novel.  But watching it for the first time in 2020, it seems very old hat.  The dialogue is still super crisp and witty but the physical comedy just wasn't doing it for me and the musical number slides into minstrel-esque.  Not a good look but a product of its time.  It's currently streaming on the Criterion Channel.

Saving Face (2004)

  Okay, so this was supposed to be Beasts of No Nation but I really wasn't in the mood to watch child soldiers.  Turns out I was also not in the mood for systemic racism even if it is wrapped up in a cutesy love story, so no Hundred-Foot Journey either.  Where did that leave me, other than two days behind schedule?  Back at Saving Face (the other one)!

Wilhelmina (Michelle Krusiec) is a promising doctor and dutiful Chinese daughter.  When her mother (Joan Chen) is alienated by her own father (Jin Wang) for getting pregnant out of wedlock, Wil dutifully takes her in, even as she struggles to balance work and a burgeoning relationship with her boss's daughter, Vivian (Lynn Chen), a ballerina under her own familial strains.  Ma refuses to say who the baby's father is, enduring date after date in order to find a husband to return her to her family's good graces.  Wil is terrified of coming out to her mother but also of losing Vivian.  

This is a great indie film, both from an LGBTQ standpoint and an immigrant/diaspora narrative.  Queer rom-coms are still pretty thin on the ground and they especially were in 2004.  The story beats are very trope-y but there is value in having gay relationships normalized.  It was obviously a deeply personal story for writer/director Alice Wu and her cultural nuances are integral to making the story feel lived in.  If you swooned for Crazy Rich Asians but wanted it gayer, this is the movie for you.  It's currently streaming on Amazon Prime.

3-Iron (2004)

  This poster is gorgeous.  Unfortunately, I didn't like the movie all that much.

A young man (Hee Jae) breaks into people's houses while they are away.  He doesn't steal, just uses their shelter and facilities, maybe eats some food, and repairs small things around the house.  All harmless until he breaks into Ming-yu's (Hyuk-ho Kwon) house and discovers the man's battered wife, Sun-hwa (Seung-Yun Lee).  They run away together but the law is on Ming-yu's side and the young man is imprisoned.  Can the lovers find their way back to one another?

I don't like romantic dramas and I didn't know that's what this was going in.  It's not terrible, as these things go, but it's really not something I enjoyed.  The two main characters have one line of dialogue between them the entire movie and I found many of their choices bizarre.  Also, the whole "breaking into people's houses and sitting around until they come home" thing gave me anxiety.  It's currently streaming for free on Tubi.