This movie was awesomely, gloriously, stupidly violent. And I mean that in the best possible sense.Saturday, Christy and I went to see Vamps but it wasn't actually playing at the theater we like. Somewhat disappointed, we just decided to see whatever was playing next. And, lo, the heavens did open up and a voice spake "Thou shalt see The Man with the Iron Fists". And it was good.
I'm not sure what the other people in the theater thought this movie was going to be. From the opening credits, which are freeze frames of battle scenes in the most cheesetastic 70's style font and colors, to the dialogue, which is exactly what you would expect from a movie written by Wu Tang Clan founder RZA, it is balls-out crazy. And everybody knows that's my favorite kind of crazy. It's not a particularly well-acted movie. Jamie Chung in particular should have known better. But it's an instant B-movie classic and, for that, I will own it.
Thaddeus the blacksmith (RZA) is trying to save up enough money to elope with Lady Silk (Jamie Chung) and buy her out of her contract at Madame Blossom's (Lucy Liu) brothel. At the same time, the Lion Clan has had a change of leadership when Silver Lion (Byron Mann) conspires with assassin Poison Dagger (Daniel Wu) to kill Gold Lion (Kuan Tai Chen) so they can steal a shipment of gold headed north. Gold Lion's son, the X Blade (Rick Yune) hears about the murder and comes to town to avenge his father. Silver Lion hires Brass Body (Dave Bautista), a brawler with impenetrable skin, to kill the X Blade.
This film really is a love story to the old style of low-quality Chinese and Japanese martial arts films from the 70s. There's a whole Enter the Dragon sequence with a hall of mirrors, and some of the Hyena Clan reminded me of the bandits from Lady Snowblood, plus hosts of others I'm sure. People spurt blood like firehoses and sport impractically beautiful clothing and weapons while zooming overhead on wires.
In short, it is absolutely amazeballs and you should go see it.
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