My roomie bought Silent Hill last night and we watched it today. Ah, nothing like snuggling under the covers in the dark, watching a scary movie with your best girl.
Yeah, except the movie sucked. It was so dumb! For starters, the whole damn movie was shot in the dark, with only occasional glimpses of something orangey. That's a real word. Shut up. I know it's supposed to be for ambiance or whatever, but it was really annoying, like being at a rave where they only have orange glo-sticks. After a minute, you just want to punch somebody in the face and get the hell out of there.
Back to the movie. Half the characters had no friggin' point. Why was the lady cop there? Because she was in the video game. Okay, that's nice, but she SERVES NO PURPOSE in the movie. Yeah, and if the stupid "apocalyptic fire" or whatever the hell it was happened 30 years ago, why didn't the dude cop age? Cause this movie sucks, that's why! And it had the most trite, anti-climactic ending I've ever seen.
Silent Hill, you get the Stewie Award for extreme suckage. You know the Family Guy episode where Stewie gets on a plane and flies to California just so he can slap Will Farrell in the face and scream, "NOT FUNNY!" Yeah, that's the Stewie Award. Silent Hill isn't even Craptastic, just Crap. Like I would expect monkeys at the zoo to fling copies of the DVD at the bars of their cage. What's that smell? Oh, you accidentally stepped in Silent Hill out in the yard. Yeah, make sure you take your shoes off so you don't track Silent Hill all over the carpets.
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