Saturday, September 30, 2023

Sirens (1994)

  There are no mermaids in this movie.  Just in case you were wondering.  There are a bunch of mostly naked women.  But no mythological creatures of any kind.  Move along, fishfuckers.

A young vicar (Hugh Grant) and his wife (Tara Fitzgerald) discover more than they expected about themselves while visiting an artist (Sam Neill) and his harem of models in 1930s Australia.  The vicar tries to convince the artist that his painting of a nude Venus at the Crucifixion is blasphemous while the models try to convince the vicar's wife to get naked.

Despite the presence of 90s supermodel Elle McPherson and a young Portia de Rossi, this isn't a very good movie.  It's pretty boring unless you are incredibly repressed.  Even then, you should probably just discover the internet.  It is streaming on Peacock and on Paramount+ should you fail to heed my warnings.

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