I have two words for you: zombie samurai. All your arguments are invalid.
This was a very fun, very bizarre Japanese zombie movie.
It starts with some muthafuckin' zombie samurai in a weird flashback that means nothing until two-thirds of the way through the film. From there, it jumps to two escaped prisoners meeting with some no-good mobster types and a kidnapped girl. One of the prisoners (you can tell he's the hero because he's just so damn bored with the whole situation and also because he's wearing leather) mouths off until he can free the kidnapped girl and one of the bad guys gets shot.
He immediately comes back as a zombie and tries to kill the other bad guys. I know, I know, zombies in a place called the Forest of Resurrection, who'da thunk? In the midst of the confusion, the Hero and the Virgin (come on, she's wearing white, you know she's gotta be) escape deeper into the forest. The bad guys give chase, until one of them completely loses his shit remembering that they buried a fuckton of guys out here. Sure enough, as if on cue, dead bad guys surround the original bad guys. This gets important: Japanese zombies can shoot at you. This represents an important step in zombie evolution. They don't aim, but still, a stray bullet will kill you just as definitely as an aimed one.
Eventually, the Big Boss shows up (you can tell he's the main bad guy because he's just so bored with the whole damn situation and also because he's wearing leather) and narrates the plot in one conversation. Basically, there's power up for grabs in the forest and he wants him some but the pesky virgin and her hero are standing in the way. Also, the hero is his brother, reincarnated from samurai times (everything makes sense now!).
Anyway, this movie is hysterical, full of zombies, martial arts, and buckets of fake blood. Also, no CGI. Every effect is a practical one. Which doesn't mean that it makes sense, or is good. Just that it was made of latex and foam rubber. Have a couple of your drink of choice and I bet this movie gets exponentially better.
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