Thursday, October 3, 2019

We Heart Horror 2019 - Day 3: The Wicker Man (1973)

   I'm noticing a trend so far this month.  Islands are bad news.  Don't go to any remote islands filled with insular populations by yourself.  That's your PSA for this year.

Sergeant Howie (Edward Woodward) has been summoned to Summerisle by name to search for a missing girl.  He finds the islanders uncooperative and close-mouthed, which is normal because they are Scottish, but also espousing dangerously heretical views on maypoles, sex education, and proper maintenance of holy sites.

Frankly, this shouldn't be considered a horror movie any more.  In 1973, when the Establishment was clutching their pearls over free love and John Lennon going barefoot, sure.  The Horror.  But today?  When the planet is on fucking fire?  Sacrifices to the Earth Mother start to seem pretty reasonable.  In fact, in light of this state of affairs, I propose a new summation of the film as follows:

Close-minded religious zealot and puppet of authoritarianism harasses peaceful, environmentally-sustainable farming community in attempts to force his own political and moral viewpoint and reaps the consequences thereof.

There.  I fixed it.

No, we're not going to talk about the Nicholas Cage version.

The original is streaming on the Criterion Channel.

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