The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (2008)

  This was a much harder movie to enjoy than the first one.   I'm a little surprised this didn't kill the franchise but I haven't seen the third one yet.

The Pevensie children are finally starting to adjust to life back in mundane old England when they are summoned once more to Narnia.  However, what has been a year for them has been over four centuries for the land they once ruled.  Aslan (voiced by Liam Neeson) has not been seen in all that time and the Narnians have suffered a number of invasions by the neighboring country of Telmarine, with the intent of wiping them all out.  Prince Caspian X (Ben Barnes) is heir to the throne but his plotting uncle and regent Miraz (Sergio Castellitto) wants him dead.  When Miraz's wife gives birth to a son, Caspian flees to the woods.  He blows a hunting horn, Susan's (Anna Popplewell) to be exact, which is what summons the ancient queens and kings.  The Pevensies aren't exactly the same as they once were, either.  Peter (William Moseley) in particular has been chafing at the restriction that goes with not being royalty in his real life.  He practically jumps at the chance to lead an army again. 

As I said, this is a much more slight effort with no real attempt to pull together the depth of character found in the first film.  I found Ben Barnes' accent to be atrocious and it really took me out of the moment whenever he opened his mouth.  If it weren't for Peter Dinklage and Warwick Davis, I would say skip this one entirely.  Dinklage has one of the most emotive faces I have ever seen, even covered completely in fake hair.  He provided the film's only real humor or humanity.  Warwick Davis played a more menacing character than the villain himself, which was difficult with all the scenery-chewing Castellitto was doing.

Jack Reacher (2012)

I don't care what anyone tells you, this movie was sorely miscast.

I am a big fan of Lee Child's Jack Reacher series.  I've read all the books and I had a lot of trepidation when I heard that Paramount had optioned One Shot as a movie, seeing as it's not the first in the series and no one has done a movie on this character before.

Then they went and cast Tom Cruise and I lost all interest whatsoever.  I have nothing against the man, he is just not what I pictured in my head when I think Jack Reacher, a man described as 6'5", 240 lbs, blond and blue-eyed.  We're talking Chris Hemsworth bulked out like The Rock. 

Taking that aside, it's not a terrible action movie.  It's just a lousy Jack Reacher movie.

A sniper shoots five random people from a parking garage, then flees.  The police scour the area and find a thumbprint on a quarter in a meter belonging to James Barr (Joseph Sikora), a former Army sniper.  They arrest him and offer him a choice between life in prison and the death penalty if he will confess.  He says only "Get me Jack Reacher."  Reacher (Tom Cruise, sadly) is a former Military Police officer who roams the land, dispensing justice.  He sees the case on the news and immediately heads for Pittsburgh to confer.  But he's not there to clear Barr's name.  Due to a previous incident that was hushed up by the military, he is there to put Barr down for good.  Only a plucky young attorney (Rosamund Pike) can convince him that all is not as it seems with this case.

I found it unfortunate that the movie could not manage the same level of intelligence and suspense as the novel.  They compensated by adding more humor and a car chase.  Werner Herzog is underused as the villain, also a shame since I think he would have been super-creepy if we could have seen more of him.  Conversely, Robert Duvall's part was expanded a bit, if I remember the book correctly.  I can't really complain about that too much, though, since he was effortlessly charming.  As a matter of fact, I really liked the rest of the cast.  I just couldn't help myself from mentally replaying scenes with someone else in the lead.

Les Miserables (2012)

Nominated for:  Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Costumes, Best Make-up, Best Original Song, Best Production Design, and Best Sound Mixing    I actually saw this on Christmas Day with Christy but I haven't had a chance to sit down and post about it. 

I have been guardedly optimistic about seeing this movie.  You know I love me some musicals but after getting burned by Nine three Christmases ago I tend to be more cautious.  I am happy to report that this is way better than that Daniel Day-Lewis mediocrity.

Jean Valjean (Hugh Jackman) has served a 19-year prison sentence for stealing a loaf a bread to feed his starving nephew.  He gets released on parole but the guard, Javert (Russell Crowe), is a real prick about rules and puts him on the tightest leash he can.  Unable to get a job, Valjean steals some silver from a church but the priest (Colm Wilkinson, who played Valjean on Broadway) not only refuses to give him to the cops, he gives him more silver to take.  Moved by such charity, Valjean decides to give his life to God and skips parole, reinventing himself as a factory owner and mayor of a small town.  Fantine (Anne Hathaway) is one of his workers, but a fight with another woman puts her out onto the street.  She has a daughter named Cosette (Isabelle Allen) whom she boards with a shifty innkeeper (Sacha Baron Cohen) and his wife (Helena Bonham Carter).  Now jobless, Fantine drifts through the cracks in society, selling everything she can --including her body-- to pay for her child's upkeep.  When he learns that her fall from grace was partially due to his own negligence, Valjean promises to find Cosette and raise her as his own. 

Cut to eight years later, Valjean and Cosette (now Amanda Seyfried) live in Paris during one of the most politically charged periods following the Revolution.  The young men of the city are planning a protest of their rampant poverty and ill-treatment, led by firebrand Enjolras (Aaron Tveit) and his friend Marius (Eddie Redmayne).  That is until Marius catches a stray glimpse of Cosette and falls madly in love.  They're French; it happens.  Bad news for Eponine (Samantha Barks), the girl who desperately wants Marius to love her.  She knows exactly who Cosette is, too, because she is the daughter of the innkeepers Thenardier, who now run a gang of theives.  Rather than let her father break into their house, she screams a warning.  Valjean thinks the cops have finally found him and decides to make a run for it with his ward. 

Jesus, a lot of stuff happens in this movie.  There's more but you can go see it for yourselves.  Block off your schedule, though, and take tissues.  You'll be crying or close to it for three hours.

They used live singing for this movie (meaning that they filmed the actors singing in takes, rather than lip-synching to a pre-recorded soundtrack) which I liked because it felt much more organic and real.  Unfortunately, they really only filmed them singing.  There are a lot of close-ups during songs, rather than actors singing as they move through scenes.  On the one hand, this drags down the action, but on the other, it really allows them to emote the hell out of what they're singing.  As far as the quality of singing, I'd rate it as high.  Christy thought Eddie Redmayne sounded a bit like Kermit the Frog in some parts, but as the only one who didn't have a background in singing or musical theater, I thought he did a fine job.  "Empty Chairs at Empty Tables" was probably his best song.  The surprise stand-out for me was Aaron Tveit, a Broadway performer who stole every scene he was in. 

I will probably buy this when it comes out but I probably won't get the soundtrack.  Call me a purist, but I'm happy with the original cast album.

Scrooged (1988)

  The Christmas streak continues. Sometimes you just get tired of all the cute, feel-good Christmas movies and you want to watch something more...you.  This is that movie.

Frank Cross (Bill Murray) is a TV executive trying to put on a live adaptation of Charles Dickens' classic Christmas Tale.  He is a total asshole to his subordinates including his poor put-upon Assistant Grace (Alfre Woodard).  This is probably why he gets a visit from his dead former boss (John Forsythe) warning him that three other ghosts are coming for him:  Christmas Past, Present, and Future.  Christmas Past (David Johansen) takes him back to his childhood, where all his favorite memories happened on TV, and then to the day he turned his back on his sweet, charitable girlfriend (Karen Allen).  Christmas Present (Carol Kane) takes him to his brother's house, whose invitation he blows off every year, and to the subway exhaust grate where the homeless man he ignored (Michael J. Pollard) has frozen to death.  Meanwhile, a disgruntled employee (Bobcat Goldthwait) breaks into Frank's office and threatens him with a shotgun.

It's very 80's (he drinks Tab and vodka!) but the story is timeless.  Bill Murray is at his best when he plays an asshole and the supporting parts are very well-cast.  The stand-out for me is Carol Kane.  She's just so cute and violent!

Honestly, there's no reason why you shouldn't already have this movie and this is the perfect time of the year to watch it.  I know, I know, Christmas was yesterday.  That's ok.  It just keeps giving.

Obligatory Year-End Post (2012)

Well, okay, it's not obligatory but it certainly is ubiquitous.  I scroll through my favorite movie news sites and it seems like everyone and their brother is posting some sort of "Best Movies of the Year" or "Top 10 for 2012".

I can do that.  Hell, according to that little counter on the right, I've watched over 200 movies this year so far.  I can put together a bitchin' list. 

Number 10:  Prometheus -- Yeah, you can sit there and pick it apart but where's the fun in that?  It's like seeing a Monet by microscope.   

Number 9:  Wreck-It Ralph -- Sugar-sweet and visually stunning.

Number 8:  Man with the Iron Fists -- I was totally surprised how much I liked it.  It was cheestastic fun.

Number 7:  Skyfall -- Good story, great interaction with the cast, and a creepy memorable villain. 

Number 6:  The Dark Knight Rises --  Probably should have been higher on my list but that middle part is a real slog of depression to get through.

Number 5:  Looper -- This had a great sci-fi premise and some of the best use of make-up I've seen all year.

Number 4:   Lockout -- I don't care what anyone says. This movie was fun.

Number 3:   Pitch Perfect -- I had no expectations going into this and I loved it. What's a little surprising is how much critics seemed to love it. I really expected this to be one of those movies you're embarassed you admit you like but it got made legit so raise your heads high, aca-bitches! 

Number 2:  The Avengers -- Ok, the only reason this one is second is because I knew I would love it.  I walked into the theater expecting to be wildly entertained and I was.  And that's why..

Number 1:  Cabin in the Woods -- Best film of the year.  I knew nothing about this film except that people were losing their tiny minds over it.  Now, I think I could watch it every day for a year and not get tired of it. 

So there you go. 

In other news, Merry Christmas, everyone!  I just finished opening all my presents and I can say that the Nail Polish Fairy has definitely visited me.  I'm going to need to be irradiated so I can grow more fingers and toes just to put these colors on!

Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (2005)

  Wednesday night I had to do a lot of baking.  I tried to just put this movie on as background because I'd seen it before but I realized just after the opening credits that wasn't going to work.  I hadn't seen it since maybe the year after it first came out in theaters and, while I do have some issues with it, it deserves to actually be watched.  So I turned it off, baked my cookies, and picked it up again on Thursday.

I remember thinking this movie wasn't all that great when I first saw it.  I think battle scenes without blood are silly and I found the story to be badly dated. Those things are still true with the second viewing but I minded them less.  Maybe it was finally seeing them on blu-ray.  The colors looked amazing and the detail was good without being oh-my-God-I-can-see-every-pore-on-their-faces. 

The four Pevensie children are sent out to the country to avoid the London Blitz attacks.  Lucy (Georgie Hensley), the youngest, discovers a magical portal through the back of a disused wardrobe into the world of Narnia.  She tries to tell her siblings but they don't believe her until her next oldest brother Edmund (Skander Keynes) follows her because he's a snot.  Once in Narnia, Edmund falls into the hands of the White Witch (Tilda Swinton) who preys upon his snottiness by promising him the ability to rule over his brother and sisters if he will lure them to her castle. 

Eventually, the two oldest children make it through the wardrobe and into Narnia.  Edmund bails as fast as he can to the Witch's castle while Lucy and the other two meet Beaver (voiced by Ray Winstone) and his wife (voiced by Dawn French) who tell them of a prophecy that the four children will one day become the kings and queens of this land and winter will be banished.  The great lion Aslan (voiced by Liam Neeson) is waiting for them with an army.  Peter (William Moseley) wants to stay and fight but is torn by the duty of keeping his little sisters and brother safe.  Susan (Anna Popplewell) is a wet blanket.  She doesn't really do much of anything except bitch.

The source books were essentially Christian dogma for children and the symbolism gets a bit heavy-handed but that shouldn't necessarily put you off from seeing this film if you're not Christian.  I will say that the age window for really enjoying this film is quite small, maybe 10-14.  I can't imagine anyone younger than that caring about the plot or anyone older being satisfied by the action.  Still, it's a very pretty movie and shouldn't simply be dismissed out of hand.

Moonraker (1979)

  This falls under the Dumb But Cute category of Bond movies.  Just because your movie is set in space doesn't mean you can get all slap-happy with story and plot.

Bond (Roger Moore) is put on the case of the missing space shuttle, Moonraker, and flies out to California to visit the shuttle manufacturer Hugo Drax (Michael Lonsdale), who reeks of villainry.

Seriously, it's like he went to a Kim Jong Il's tailor.  Anyway, Drax allows Bond free access to his facilityand sends his manservant to quietly kill him.  Meanwhile, Bond meets astronaut and head scientist Dr. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles) and giggles like a schoolboy over her name.  Forget the fact that the woman is a highly-trained member of an incredibly select sub-group of scientists, let's chortle over her name sounding dirty.  After Bond learns nothing at Drax's place, he wanders over to Venice and discovers a glassblower's shop that doubles as a lab.  He also bumps into Dr. Goodhead again and, surprise, she's working for the CIA.  Drax gets fed up with Bond nosing around and hires Jaws (Richard Kiel), the metal-toothed giant from The Spy Who Loved Me, to get rid of the MI6 agent for good.  Jaws catches up to them in Rio but manages to meet a sweet pig-tailed blond (Blanche Ravalec) and fall head over heels.  Then space happens.  Bond and Goodhead (ugh, I hate typing that) uncover Drax's cunning plan to fly a bunch of hot people into his space station --hidden by radar, of course-- and hit the redo button on Earth by launching globes filled with nerve gas onto the planet. 

This is Rob's favorite movie of the series, just for sheer silliness.  I was less amused but I did like that they fleshed out Richard Kiel's character.  He's much more entertaining here and even gets a line of dialogue.  You can definitely see some Star Wars influence with the laser guns and the astronaut battle but it comes across as very dated and campy now.  Not the best of the Bond series by any means, but at least it wasn't horribly offensive.