Hail, Caesar (2016)

Nominated for Best Production Design      This was way cuter than I thought it was going to be.  Christy actually gave me her DVD because she didn't like it so I didn't have very high hopes.

Eddie Mannix (Josh Brolin) is a fixer for Capitol Pictures who is contemplating a job switch to Lockheed.  While he's considering, one of the studio's biggest stars, Baird Whitlock (George Clooney), is kidnapped from the set of their prestige picture, Hail, Caesar!.  Eddie has to manage the disappearance and ransom demands, as well as deal with a knocked up, unmarried starlet (Scarlett Johansson), twin rival gossip columnists (Tilda Swinton), an angry director (Ralph Fiennes), and an up-and-coming star desperately in need of an image change (Alden Ehrenreich).  All in a day's work.

This is a love letter to Hollywood of the 1950s, a time of lavish musicals and Biblical epics, along with the constant specter of Communism and nuclear annihilation.  Your familiarity with any and all of these topics may or may not affect your enjoyment of the movie.  I thought it was super cute and actually redeemed Channing Tatum nearly 100%.

Nearly.  I'm not ready to forgive Magic Mike XXL yet.

The production design is excellent.  Every set looks time appropriate, the costumes are beautiful, and even the lighting is perfectly in character.  I'm a little surprised this didn't get more recognition since the Academy loves the Coen Brothers.  Any other year and they'd be good for a Best Original Screenplay nomination at least.  There must be some seriously stiff competition this year.  I don't know if I could even compare this to Fantastic Beasts, which is the only other nominee in the Production Design category I've seen so far.  They're like apples and oranges.

Hidden Figures (2016)

Nominated for Best Picture, Best Supporting Actress, and Best Adapted Screenplay  I had been looking forward to this film since the Golden Globes and I was glad it got nominated for at least one Oscar so I could see it sooner.  (Currently, my Netflix queue is averaging about four years from addition to top of the list.)

Katherine Goble (Taraji P. Henson) and Mary Jackson (Janelle Monae) work as computers for NASA under Dorothy Vaughn (Octavia Spencer).  Katherine, a certified genius, is assigned to the Space Task Group under Al Harrison (Kevin Costner).  Their purpose is to calculate a trajectory that will get a manned space vehicle out of Earth's gravity and into orbit before Russia (the USSR at the time) can do the same.  Mary, meanwhile, is assigned to the group attaching the heat shields to the outside of the module.  All three women are continually undervalued and discriminated against because of their race and sex.  All three women continually push the boundaries for what is accepted, fighting to be seen.

This film is based on true events and has a nice little follow up to history just before the end credits.  It is a very hopeful story, which is sorely needed in America right now.  Having to fight and struggle for what are basic rights for anyone else is unbelievably draining, but these women never let despair or opposition stop them from recognizing their own worth.  Like Hydra, racism and sexism never really go away, they just sprout new, more subtle heads.  The fight must go on.

Now that I've scared all of you away with my pro-feminism rant, I will say that the movie was competently made, but I don't know about its chances at Best Picture.  It is the first one of the category I have seen (all three categories to be honest) and I liked it, but I don't know if it will win.  I love Octavia Spencer in everything I have seen her in, but I don't think she'll win either.  I think the supporting nod should probably have gone to Janelle Monae.  It has a decent shot at the screenplay Oscar, though.

The White Helmets (2016)

Nominated for Best Documentary Short    Another day, another soul-crushing Oscar documentary.  This one comes courtesy of Netflix and is only about 40 minutes long.

The Syria Civil Defense, or White Helmets, are a group of volunteers from all over Syria who rush into danger and save people from collapsed buildings after bombings.  These men (they only showed men for whatever reason) are not professional cops, or firefighters, or affiliated with any government. They just want to help as many people as they possibly can.  The short follows a group from Aleppo as they attend a month-long rescue training camp in Turkey, with flashbacks to some of their work on the ground.

The documentary itself is very hands-off.  It's not asking any particular questions, and not promoting any agenda.  It's just shining a spotlight on people trying to do something amazing in the face of overwhelming odds.  That being said, I don't know that I give it high odds of taking home an Oscar.  It will really depend on the rest of the films in the category.

The Student of Prague (1913)

  This is the first film from my German Cinema class.  I will be watching at least one film a week, which works out beautifully for you guys.  I think this is also the earliest film I've ever seen.  It predates World War I.

Balduin (Paul Wegener) is a student at the University of Prague.  He has a reputation of being the best swordsman in the city but he's also known as a wild child, and is usually flat broke.  An old man (John Gottowt) offers Balduin the opportunity to improve his fortunes by signing a contract with the Devil.  The contract guarantees Balduin 100,000 gold pieces in exchange for whatever the Devil wants from Balduin's room.  Seeing as he owns next to nothing, Balduin thinks this is a great deal.  He hadn't considered that the Devil would take Balduin's reflection from the mirror and use it to create a doppelgänger.

The print we saw was terrible.  Even the professor said so.  Apparently, there's a much better copy on YouTube but the sub/intertitles are shit.  I'm going to take her word for it.  It's always interesting to see some of the earliest films, but I'm not going to lie, this was a struggle to watch.  For whatever reason, I just couldn't connect to it visually even though I felt like I understood and appreciated the story.

Technically, this is considered a horror movie, though nothing about it would be considered horrifying today.  Selling your soul to Satan just doesn't pack the same amount of punch as it used to, I guess.  (**refraining from making a political joke**)

Oscar Nominations for 2016

It's nominations day again!  I didn't see any real surprises here.  All the major categories match up pretty seamlessly with the Golden Globes this year.  The shitty part is that I have seen next to none of these films, and with my school schedule, I don't have high hopes of seeing many more.  Obviously, I will continue to try my hardest to get some reviews out there and I appreciate everyone being patient with me during this time.

Best Picture
Arrival
Fences
Hacksaw Ridge
Hell or High Water
Hidden Figures
La La Land
Lion
Manchester by the Sea
Moonlight

Best Director
Arrival - Denis Villenueve
Hacksaw Ridge - Mel Gibson
La La Land - Damien Chazelle
Manchester by the Sea - Kenneth Lonergan
Moonlight - Barry Jenkins

Best Actor
Casey Affleck - Manchester by the Sea
Andrew Garfield - Hacksaw Ridge
Ryan Gosling - La La Land
Viggo Mortensen - Captain Fantastic
Denzel Washington - Fences

Best Actress
Isabelle Huppert - Elle
Ruth Negga - Loving
Emma Stone - La La Land
Natalie Portman - Jackie
Meryl Streep - Florence Foster Jenkins

Best Supporting Actor
Mahershala Ali - Moonlight
Jeff Bridges - Hell or High Water
Lucas Hedges - Manchester by the Sea
Dev Patel - Lion
Michael Shannon - Nocturnal Animals

Best Supporting Actress
Viola Davis - Fences
Naomie Harris - Moonlight
Nicole Kidman - Lion
Octavia Spencer - Hidden Figures
Michelle Williams - Manchester by the Sea

Best Original Screenplay
Hell or High Water
La La Land
The Lobster
Manchester by the Sea
20th Century Women

Best Adapted Screenplay
Arrival
Fences
Hidden Figures
Lion
Moonlight

Best Cinematography
Arrival
La La Land
Lion
Moonlight
Silence

Best Documentary
Fire at Sea
I am Not Your Negro
Life, Animated
O.J.: Made in America
The 13th

Best Foreign Language Film
Land of Mine - Denmark
A Man Called Ove - Sweden
The Salesman - Iran
Tanna - Australia
Toni Erdmann - Germany

Best Costume Design
Allied
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Florence Foster Jenkins
Jackie
La La Land

Best Original Score
Jackie
La La Land
Lion
Moonlight
Passengers

Best Original Song
"Audition" - La La Land
"Can't Stop the Feeling!" - Trolls
"City of Stars" - La La Land
"The Empty Chair"  - Jim: The James Foley Story
"How Far I'll Go" - Moana

Best Sound Editing
Arrival
Deepwater Horizon
Hacksaw Ridge
La La Land
Sully

Best Sound Mixing
Arrival
Hacksaw Ridge
La La Land
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
13 Hours

Best Documentary Short
4.1 Miles
Extremis
Joe's Violin
Watani: My Homeland
The White Helmets

Best Production Design
Arrival
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Hail Caesar
La La Land
Passengers

Best Animated Feature
Kubo and the Two Strings
Moana
My Life as a Zucchini
The Red Turtle
Zootopia

Best Animated Short
Blind Vaysha
Borrowed Time
Pear Cider and Cigarettes
Pearl
Piper

Best Film Editing
Arrival
Hacksaw Ridge
Hell or High Water
La La Land
Moonlight

Best Visual Effects
Deepwater Horizon
Doctor Strange
The Jungle Book
Kubo and the Two Strings
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

Best Makeup and Hair
A Man Called Ove
Star Trek Beyond
Suicide Squad

Best Live-Action Short
Ennemis Interieurs
La Femme et la TGV
Silent Nights
Sing
Timecode

Ultraviolet (2006)

This was supposed to go up on Sunday and it would have if my brain weren't so fried.
  This is the first Christy pick of 2017!  Yay!  We actually decided to watch it together, which requires some negotiation since she lives in South Carolina and I live in Maryland.  At the appointed time, we fired up our cell phones, settled in and pressed play on our respective blu-ray players.  And then the troubles began.

The first was a technical issue we had not foreseen.  She had the extended edition while I had the theatrical.  There's only six minutes of footage difference between the two but it was enough to throw off our sync.

The second problem was that we were watching Ultraviolet, one of the worst movies Milla Jovovich has ever done and that is counting entries 4-6 of the Resident Evil franchise.  According to Christy's research (IMDb), the film was originally a full 120 minutes but the studio had it re-edited because they felt it didn't highlight enough of the action, and cut it down to 88 minutes.  The extended edition only brings it back up to 94 minutes so I don't know what happened to the rest of it.  Or if it would have helped at all.

In the near-ish future, a virus has turned some people into vampires.  The Archministry has finally developed a weapon that will rid them of the hemophages (because vampire is too plebeian a word) but it is stolen by Violet (Milla Jovovich).  Despite being told not to open the case, she does it anyway and discovers that the weapon is actually a child (Cameron Bright) whose blood contains an antigen that will supposedly destroy vampires forever.  She knows the other vampires will just kill the boy outright and she can't exactly turn him back over to the Archministry, so she goes on the run with him.

Honestly, this is a dumb movie with terrible CGI that's not worth watching even to see how bad it is.  The action is frenetic and constant (thanks to the hatchet job done by the studio) and doesn't fit in with the non-action parts at all.  The cut portions apparently explain about Violet's past and how she desperately wanted to be a mother but had successive miscarriages, which would have gone a long way towards understanding her reluctance to just dump the boy.  I don't know that it would have improved the movie enough to make it passable but it couldn't have hurt.

Annie Hall (1977)

  So this is considered one of the best films not only by Woody Allen, but the whole of American cinema.

It's okay, I guess.

Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) is an up-and-coming comedian in New York City when he meets Annie Hall (Diane Keaton), a would-be singer and photographer from Middle America.  Over the course of the film, told mostly in flashbacks, Alvy tries to understand where it all went wrong.

Five minutes in and I could tell you.

Maybe this level of narcissism appeals to some people.  I found it obnoxious.  I do think the film has important things to say about how we try to remake the people we love in our own image but it never actually addresses the issue, just leaving it for the viewer.  Allen's character never makes any real progress and seems to be doomed to living the same loop of self-destructive relationships because he can't get out of his own way.  That's really depressing to me.  The only good thing about this movie was the number of cameos from people who would go on to be super famous.

I've never been the biggest Woody Allen fan, so maybe that's my bias but I'd say this is one classic that you can just get the Cliff Notes for.

Straw Dogs (2011)

Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day!  Here's a movie about racist rednecks!  This is a remake of the 1971 Sam Peckinpah film, which I have not seen.  Normally, I like to see the original first but it's pretty far down the list right now and the remake was right there on the server.  Well, it was.  I deleted it as soon as I was done watching it. You'll see why in a minute.

Screenwriter David Sellman (James Marsden) and his actress wife, Amy (Kate Bosworth), have bought a house in Amy's old hometown of Blackwater.  The locals welcome Amy back with open arms, but are more distrustful of Ivy League, wealthy David, especially Amy's old boyfriend, Charlie (Alexander Skarsgaard), who has been hired to put a new roof on the Sellman's barn.  Situations escalate until the only recourse is fire and blood.

This is one of those movies where you can see every time a character puts a foot wrong, it's like a nail in their coffin.  The inevitability of it wears on me.  Plus, they use lack of communication as a plot device and that has always annoyed me.  I don't mean "oh, no, my cell phone is dead right when I needed it most" although that is also a cheap trick, but the "I know something that would cause you to act but I'm not going to tell you so you'll invariably make the wrong decision because you don't have all the facts" thing.  I hate that.

It's not that there's necessarily anything wrong with this particular movie.  It is suitably intense and serves its purpose in that regard, so if you like watching trainwrecks and/or any of the leads give it a shot.  I'm going to hold out for the original before I say I don't like it, but I don't regret deleting it.

Albert Nobbs (2011)

  It took me four days to watch this all the way through.  Partly because I had school and work, and partly because it's slower than paint drying.

Albert Nobbs (Glenn Close) has worked as a waiter/butler in Ireland for 30 years.  While working at Morrison's Hotel, he accidentally reveals his deep secret to a contracted painter, Hubert Page (Janet McTeer):  Albert was born Alba but adopted a male persona in order to get work and be protected from those that would take advantage of a woman.  Albert begs Hubert not to tell, so Hubert reveals a secret of his own:  also a woman living as a man.  Hubert has gone all the way, however, and even married a nice young woman (Bronagh Gallagher).  This gives Albert so much hope for the future that he starts shopping around for a suitable bride who will leave with him to open a tobacco shop.  He sets his eyes on Helen (Mia Wasikowska), a maid at the hotel, without realizing that she is actually involved with Joe (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), an alcoholic handyman who has promised to take Helen to America with him.  They need money for the trip, so Joe convinces Helen to string Albert along to try and get the cash out of him.

There are moments of lightness in the film, as the character is really a sweet, simple soul, but I kept waiting for something awful to happen to him for that same reason.  This is a character drama.  You can't have a nice person in it unless something tragic is waiting to befall them.  When the other shoe did drop, it wasn't what I was expecting and seemed like a cop-out.  I'm sure it has to do with the vagaries of fate and the overall randomness of life, but it was still unsatisfying.

Unless you're really into period films, I'd say give this one a miss.

Golden Globes Winners and Recap

Yeah, this is like a week late.  Sorry.  You probably don't even care anymore, but it's a pro forma thing.  Oscar nominations come out in about a week and a half and then things will get kuh-razy in here.

If you didn't catch the Golden Globes telecast, it's okay.  Most of the good bits are online anyway.  I encourage everyone to at least watch the opening number.  It was super cute.  I have never liked Jimmy Fallon (I find him unctuous) but he was tolerable here.  Less so as the night went on.

Best Supporting Actor in a film went to Aaron Taylor-Johnson for Nocturnal Animals.
Best Actor in a TV Show, Drama went to Billy Bob Thornton for Goliath.  He also gave a really nice speech in tribute of a cast member who died during production.
Best Actress in a TV Show, Comedy or Musical went to Tracee Ellis-Ross for Black-ish.
Best TV Series, Comedy or Musical went to Atlanta.

I don't know why, but so many men had really horrible facial hair this year.  And all the ones who had facial hair (bad or otherwise) last year seemed to have swapped with men who didn't.  I found it distracting.  I would never consider myself an expert on men's fashion; I've just never really paid all that much attention.  But someone should have let Vince Vaughn's suit out another inch or so.  The man sounded like he was struggling to get a breath while he introduced Hacksaw Ridge for Best Motion Picture, Drama.

Best Actress in a Limited Series or Made for TV Movie went to Sarah Paulson for The People vs OJ Simpson.
Best Limited Series or Made for TV Movie also went to The People vs OJ Simpson.

Annette Benning came out to introduce 20th Century Women for Best Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical.  She looked amazing.  I've never really watched any of her movies, but she always comes across as a class act to me.

Best Supporting Actor in a Limited Series or Made for TV Movie went to Hugh Laurie for The Night Manager.  He has now gotten to the point where he should just go ahead and shave his head until science can cure male pattern baldness.  I love him but damn.

Best Original Score went to La La Land, the first of a winning streak that ultimately concluded with it winning every single category which it was nominated.  It's gotten to the point where I'm almost dreading watching it because there's no way it will live up to all the hype.

Best Original Song went to La La Land.
Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture went to Viola Davis for Fences.
Best Supporting Actress in a Limited Series or Made for TV Movie went to Olivia Coleman for The Night Manager.
Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Comedy went to Ryan Gosling for La La Land.  For a hot second when the announcer said "Ryan -" I thought they were going to give it to Ryan Reynolds and my heart leaped with joy.  Then they said "Gosling" and my heart settling back into its vengeful murmuring.  Reynolds made out with Andrew Garfield, though, so it's not a bad consolation prize.  #SpideyPool4ever
Best Screenplay went to Damien Chazelle for La La Land.
Best Animated Film went to Zootopia.  This was the biggest disappointment of the night for me.

Casey Affleck introduced Manchester by the Sea for Best Motion Picture, Drama.  He looked like a hobo somebody picked up from around a trash fire, stuffed into a tux, and handed a microphone.  Also, apparently he is giving his brother a run for the money as Worst Affleck by being under investigation for sexual assault.

Best Foreign Language Film went to Elle.
Best Actor in a Limited Series or Made for TV Movie went to Tom Hiddleston for The Night Manager.

Okay. The win was totally deserved and you know how much I love my T-Hiddles.  BUT.  The speech he gave was awful.  Rambling, humblebragging, and totally self-absorbed, yet completely earnest.  It was the most tone-deaf thing all night.

Best Actress in a TV Series, Drama went to Claire Foy for The Crown.
Best TV Series, Drama also went to The Crown.  It was a good night for Netflix.

Then came the biggest moment of the night:  Meryl Streep accepting the Cecil B. DeMille Award.  After a lovely introduction by Viola Davis, Dame Meryl got up and delivered a beautiful acceptance speech urging people to strive for understanding and empathy.  If you watched the news or have the Internet, you know what happened after that.  If not, just know that it was not the most professional response from the to-be holder of the highest office in the country.

Best Director went to Damien Chazelle for La La Land.
Best Actor in a TV Series, Comedy or Musical went to Donald Glover for Atlanta.
Best Actress in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical went to Emma Stone for La La Land, surprising no one.
Best Picture, Comedy or Musical went to La La Land.
Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama went to Casey Affleck for Manchester by the Sea.
Best Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama went to Isabelle Huppert for Elle, surprising everyone.
And finally, Best Picture, Drama went to Moonlight.

As Golden Globes ceremonies go, this wasn't the greatest.  I think a lot of people are scared about the future and that colored the proceedings even when people didn't mean for it to.

Starship Troopers: Invasion (2012)

  I don't know why this exists.  Who asked for a fourth Starship Troopers movie?!  Did you, whoever you are, also request that it be totally CGI?  It seems terribly odd to me.  I don't know why anybody made Troopers 1-3 either, to be honest, but at least those employed living human beings.  And Casper van Dien.

A starship full of troopers goes to a colony on a rescue mission.  A government bureaucrat named Carl Jenkins (Justin Doran) commandeers the ship and takes off for parts unknown, leaving the captain (Luci Christian) to scramble aboard the next ship with the remaining survivors.  She is not pleased and immediately petitions for a chase and retrieval.  They locate the missing ship only to find it is overrun by the aliens they have spent this entire franchise fighting.  Chaos ensues.

This whole movie was like one giant cut scene from a first-person-shooter video game.  The animation is terrible.  It looks worse than Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within and that movie came out over a decade before this one.  And it's not even suitable for children, what with the explicit language and violence.  There's even animated nudity, which might bother some people, but honestly, they're so poorly animated they bear as much resemblance to real bodies as a Barbie doll does.  As I said, the existence of this movie baffles me.

P2 (2007)

  The final Christy pick of 2016!

Angela (Rachel Nichols) is working late on Christmas Eve.  When she finally manages to get everything done, the whole building is locked down and her car won't start.  She has to find the creepy security guy (Wes Bentley) to let her back into the elevator so she can go to the lobby and call a cab.  Surprise, surprise, creepy security guy doesn't want her to leave and chloroforms her.  She wakes up chained to a table so they can "get to know one another better" over dinner.

This is a little too one-note to be a great horror or thriller film.  It does get points for being realistic in calling men out for the "Nice Guy" act.  Tom the security guy keeps telling Angela how lucky she is that he is there for her and whining about how unappreciative she is being when she very clearly states that she doesn't want anything to do with him.  Minus the part where he kidnaps her and kills several people, this is an experience many women have had.  Reddit has an entire sub-thread devoted to stories like this.

Now, I'm not saying men can't be nice or ladies should be suspicious every time a man is nice to you.  I'm saying there's a subset of males who think being "nice" (their version) entitles them to your attention, time, and/or sexual favors.  Spoiler alert:  it does not.

Now that I've lauded the movie on its feminist principles, let's move on to talking about how it sucks. There's nothing particularly original about the story or setting.  The two main roles could have been played by anyone, which is actually a compliment to the universal nature of the story, but also kind of a dig toward both actors.  Bentley and Nichols didn't bring anything to the table the director couldn't have gotten from kids fresh out of summer stock.  Maybe they're obscure enough that doesn't bother you.

Also, the ending.  The vast majority of you can probably figure out exactly what happens just from reading the synopsis and having seen 9000 movies like this before but I'll put it in white just in case.  Highlight it with your mouse to see.  ***SPOILER ALERT:  Okay, so she manages to fake him out about being unconscious long enough to handcuff him to the door of the car.  Now she's free and has a clear path to the exit and safety.  Then he calls her The C Word.  So she turns around and ignites the trail of gasoline, which immolates the car and him.  With me?  Okay.  That, my friends, is straight-up murder.  Not self-defense.  And it makes her just as bad as him.  "But Lucy," you say, "he had kidnapped, tortured, and harassed her.  Doesn't she deserve a little payback?"  To which I reply, yes, sure, but not for being called a cunt.  Like, you've been Tazed, drugged, and had to watch a creepy video about your assaulter putting makeup on you while you were passed out, but having someone yell a slur at you when you've already won, THAT'S the last straw?  No.  END SPOILERS***

TL;DR:  This isn't the worst horror film you could watch but it's not great.  Maybe recommend it to your friend who just had a horrible break-up.

Destiny (1921)

  As many of you know, or have guessed by now, I am going to college.  Next semester (which actually starts in less than a month) for my last elective, I am taking German Cinema.  I was trying to get into the Horror Cinema class but that was waitlisted for like 1000 years.  I have no idea what we'll be covering in the class but I don't imagine we'll leave out Fritz Lang.  Serendipitously, I had added one of his films to my queue ages ago and started watching it on vacation.  I finally had time to finish it yesterday.

A young woman (Lil Dagover) is on vacation with her sweetheart (Walter Janssen) when he is stolen away by Death (Bernhard Goetzke).  The young woman begs Death to return her love and he offers her a chance to get him back if she could prevent the death of even one of three young men sharing the same fate.  So the woman steps in to three separate stories to try and save at least one iteration of the man she loves.

In 1921, these special effects must have been astonishing.  Even by today's standards, the storytelling is excellent.  Each mini-story is brought to life by beautiful costuming and sets for Turkey, Venice, and China, and while it is a little weird to see German actors playing Turkish and Chinese characters, you just kind of roll with it.

I haven't seen any movies featuring Death as a character in a long time, but folklore abounds with tales like this one.  Death could be pleaded with, bargained with, occasionally cheated, and sometimes he even took a vacation.  It's nice to go back and look at the representations of life's final mystery through the eyes of different cultures.

End of Year 2016

Happy first day of 2017!  Here's hoping that it's better than 2016.

It's time now for my annual top ten movies of the year.  Last year's list (2015) was harder to rank the top half.  This year's top three were absolute no-brainers.  The second half was much harder.  I also didn't see as many new releases as I would have liked, only 20 for the whole calendar year.  I know I'm missing a bunch of kick-ass films but I just didn't get to them in time.  So here are the top ten of the ones I did see.

10.  Finding Dory -- For a sequel, this is not a bad movie.  But if I had seen more this year, it probably wouldn't have made the cut.

9.  Doctor Strange -- Magic in the Marvel universe.  This was a little more of a low-key film by itself but I have to respect the amount of influence it brings to the overall multiverse.  Plus, it gave me more Rachel McAdams, Tilda Swinton, and Chiwetel Ejiofor and you can't put a price on that.

8.  Rogue One: A Star Wars Story -- I thought this was really well done.  And not just for the technological achievements, which blew my freaking mind.  It was well-handled as a standalone, delivering all the character and feel of a Star Wars movie without being mired in repetition.

7.  The Nice Guys -- This movie was hilarious.  I love Shane Black.

6.  Star Trek Beyond -- And Star Trek is back on top for me.  After the wretched disappointment of the second entry, it took a herculean effort to get back into my good graces.  I love this cast so much and they all work so well together.  Losing Anton Yelchin was a horrible blow (damn you, 2016!) but I still believe they can pull off another entry.  I wouldn't have said that in 2015.

5.  The Accountant -- This was the biggest surprise on the list for me.  I really liked this movie.  I even got over Ben Affleck being in it.

4.  Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them -- I finally understand why people get all gaga for Harry Potter thanks to this movie.  I felt transported by it to a place where magic abounded if you only knew how to see.  Totally on board for this franchise.

3.  Captain America:  Civil War -- Like I said, no brainer.  There was so much awesomeness in this movie.  Black Panther, Bucky and Falcon, Giant Man, Spider-Man, so many fight scenes, Vision and Scarlet Witch.  Ugh.  Love love love.

2.  Moana -- This might have only edged out Civil War because I saw it most recently but I loved the fuck out of this movie.  It was amazing.

1.  Deadpool -- Duh.  Best movie of the year.  I will fight anyone who says otherwise.

Okay, now that we've rehashed the old, let's take a look ahead to see what we have to look forward to in the coming year.

Split --Jan 20-- It's an M. Night Shyamalan which should be enough to send anyone running for the hills but the previews actually look kind of good.  Ehhhhhhh.

xXx: The Return of Xander Cage --Jan 20-- Shut up.  I can't believe this is actually getting made.

John Wick: Chapter Two --Feb 10-- Fuck. Yes.  I am totally down.

The Lego Batman Movie --Feb 10--  OMG, yes.  All the yes in the world.

The Great Wall --Feb 17-- I love Zhang Yimou but I do not have very high expectations for this.

Logan --Mar 3-- Be still my heart.

T2:  Trainspotting --Mar 3-- I have no idea if this is going to be any good.  The original Trainspotting is legendary and they got all the original cast back, but it's been 20 years.

Kong: Skull Island --Mar 10-- You had me at Hiddleston.

Beauty and the Beast --Mar 17-- Disney is going full throttle with live-action adaptations.  So far, I'm not mad at it.

Power Rangers --Mar 24-- I can't tell if this is going to be hilarious or horrendous.

Ghost in the Shell --Mar 31-- I really loved this anime.  I feel very conflicted about this.

The Fate of the Furious --Apr 14-- This is a really stupid title.  I still haven't seen Furious 7, though.

Guardians of the Galaxy, vol 2 --May 5-- Already has my money.

King Arthur:  Legend of the Sword --May 12-- /heavy sigh  We're doing another King Arthur movie? Really?  Have we learned nothing?  At least it's got Charlie Hunnam so it'll be pretty to look at.

Alien:  Covenant --May 19-- Okay, Ridley Scott.  Blow me away.

Pirates of the Caribbean:  Dead Men Tell No Tales --May 26-- Jack Sparrow is about the only role I can stand Johnny Depp in anymore.

Baywatch --May 26-- I physically shudder at the thought of this film.  I know it has The Rock and Zac Efron and it's supposed to be very tongue-in-cheek but I'm leery of that description since I balls-out hated 21 Jump Street.

Wonder Woman --Jun 2-- Come on, DC.  This is honestly your best chance to salvage any goodwill.

The Mummy -- Jun 9-- I've seen the trailer.  I'm not terribly impressed but it might be worth it.  Too soon to tell.

Cars 3 --Jun 16-- The trailer for this looks hella dark.  I was not a fan of the Cars series but this might be worth watching.

Despicable Me 3 --Jun 30-- Could be cute.  Hopefully better than Minions.

Spider-Man:  Homecoming --Jul 7-- Already has my money, despite Spider-Man being one of my least favorite superheroes.  I need to see what Marvel is going to do with it.

War for the Planet of the Apes --Jul 14-- Aww yisssss.

Dunkirk --Jul 21-- Ugh, this is going to be so painful and depressing to watch but it's Christopher Nolan so I'm going to anyway.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets --Jul 21-- This looks really interesting.  It's been a couple of years since Luc Besson did a movie and this looks like he has gone all out.

The Dark Tower --Jul 28-- I really hated this source novel.  I couldn't get through it to save my life.  But I love Idris Elba.  Do you see my dilemma?

Annabelle 2 --Aug 11-- WTF?  Why does this movie exist?  And it got a prime blockbuster spot, too! What the hell?!

It --Sep 8-- Okay, I was totally on board with this when it was Cary Fukunaga and Will Poulter but now both those people are gone and replaced with people I've never heard of so my enthusiasm, suffice to say, has waned.

Flatliners --Sep 29-- Hey, look!  Another remake.

Blade Runner 2049 --Oct 6-- This has the potential to be just godawful if handled incorrectly.

Kingsman: The Golden Circle --Oct 6-- I am so excited about this.

Thor:  Ragnarok --Nov 3-- Absolutely.

Justice League --Nov 17-- This could totally suck but I'm hoping for a nice surprise.  Like, that DC fires Zack Snyder and hires someone who isn't so desperate to prove he's an artiste.

Murder on the Orient Express --Nov 22-- It will be interesting to see how this does, considering how dated the source material is.  Then again, it's reintroducing Poirot, which I can't be mad about.

Star Wars:  Episode VIII --Dec 15-- People are probably already standing in line for this.

Jumanji --Dec 22-- I'm trying really hard not to be mad about this.  Trying, and failing.

Pitch Perfect 3 --Dec 22-- Yes!

The Greatest Showman --Dec 25-- This is a biopic of P.T. Barnum, so I understand if a lot of you are going "what?" right now.  I've always been interested in the man, though, so I'm totally on board.

Well, that's a lot coming up for the year.  I don't know how many I'll get to, but as usual, I will spend my year watching everything I can and blurting out my opinions in blog posts for your amusement.